Birds and trees or bees.

I hate birds. They are dirty dirty unpredictable flying things, that have one purpose, ok two purposes, in life. 1) Charge at your face because they think its funny. 2) Aim and poop on the top of your face because they think its funny. You know when young boys learn to pee, and they always think its funny to aim for the toilet freshener gadget in the toilet bowl, same same, no difference.

Bird.
Brunch with sister on the back veranda in the gorgeous sun. Bird charges in. Bird stays. Bird decides to join our brunch time session. Sister frozen in shock. I shake a little dookie out of my pants. I wrap beach towel around my head. I throw random objects within reach at bird. Bird does not budge. I wrap beach towel around my head mutiple times to avoid losing my eyeballs caused by bird pecking at it. I reach out for food. Food saved. Bird, no, no you did not win.

Tree or Bee?
I walked into a branch of a tree today. I also speculate, that I may have narrowly missed the tree, and the bee that was in the tree actually stung the top of my head.

It is very sore.

Why?! What did you think birds, trees and bees meant? Dirty dirty child, you.

Love me please xx